Feenin'

The walls here in China aren't very thick.  Couple that with warm weather and open windows, add a little bit of spring sex hormones and you've got audio porn in my bedroom at 12am in the morning for the last couple of evenings.  You know when you were a kid, and that porn channel was all scrambled so all you could do was listen to the moaning and the slurping?  Okay a little overexaggerated, maybe just the last two evenings.

So baby gimmie dat toot toot, and lemme give you dat beep beep...

It all started with a little thumping from the bedroom above my apartment and the moans.  At first I thought it might have been a cat, but my trained ear from watching Jap porn (just one episode I swear) quickly dismissed my initial assessment of the situation.  To my dismay it ended about 10 minutes later, but as if on cue, the apartment below started to get busy shortly after.  I live on the second floor, and the open window from the floor below against the balcony garden the locals beneath me had acted like a loud speaker into my bedroom.  I mean, I wasn't timing it or anything, but it didn't last more than 10 minutes.  Marv, weren't you telling me that breaking the 10 minute barrier was you lifelong goal?  Come back to China!

So my friend Rob had his birthday bash last week.  I swear I need my own digicam, but fortunately, these pics were snapped.

It all started very innocently (well ok Rob was kinda drunk already)

And then he passed out...

So Andy and I decided to use him as a prop for our Magnum and Blue Steel poses

We all took bets on when he'd go down, raffled time slots out of a cup.  I had 12:20 - 12:40am but he went down at 11:09pm. 

You say you a gangsta but you never popped nuttin, you say you a wanksta, and you need to stop frontin...

I got so hammered that night off free flow red wine, pounding a couple shots and bar hopping for beers... jeeeeez...

And yes Joe/Jay (any one with the last name Lam for that matter), the girl in the 2nd pic is too young for you!

Happy birthday's to Jason, Jackie, Frances, Dave, Elaine, Janice and Mercy!

Hu Dat!?!

My latest creation...

My buddy Rob is having his birthday this Friday at Mei Bar and X-Men 2 inspired me to showcase Kelly Hu this month.  Can you believe she's almost 40?  Sweet...

Baby girl, you know my situation, and sometimes I know you get impatient, but you don't put on a show to get ovations, take it to court and go through litigations...

Finally watched X-Men 2, thanks to my Texan friend and "da ge" (big bro), recent subscriber to Xanga and Jessica Alba lover, we got a bootlegged version and watched it at a friend's house.  Jean Grey doesn't look as hot as she did in X-Men 1. 

The Matrix Reloaded Trailer... Imma be first in line for that DVD (China style bootleg of course).

Jodeci used to be one of my favourite bands, but K-Ci and Jojo's latest release makes me think those guys aren't ever going to get back together again.

Not really any new SARS updates here, except that Big Brother is watching me... actually all of us.  I was reading a news article about Big Brother monitoring SMS messages for SARS rumours, being able to pinpoint the users location and swooping in to take them in (or out?).  Shanghai is taking EXTREME precautions to try to limit its damage to SARS.  Quarantining people, putting them in military hospitals etc.  Someone I know, through a third party source told me about a very mean trick that was played...

She goes to school and she was being a real biatch to some other biatch, and the second biatch told the school that the first biatch had just come back from Beijing and looked liked she had SARS symptoms.  The authorities came and quarantined her at a local military hospital.

An old acquaintence of mine, I bumped into her at Park 97 last Saturday.  She used to be a dancer at this local club that I used to go to, turns out she's a mamasan now for one of those shady KTV joints.  She pimps out about 300 chicks for a living now.   Marv, you sick bastard.  Just felt like saying that.  We all know Ron would be first in line for that sheit.  Followed very closely by Joe.

The observant will notice that I've linked two China bloggers on this latest blog.  There are plenty more yeah yeh!

Happy Birthdays to Aeri, Lawrence, Terry, Shannon, Keith, Ricky, Rob and Susie!

Lovin' You Like A Fat Kid Love Cake

Longtime readers of my blogs should be familiar with this pic.

So far, Shanghai is still being quite calm about this whole SARS thing.  Most of the expats I know are still partying their asses off here.  I myself have been drunk every evening since last Thursday. 

So what I 'm drunk.  This is MY house, and you can get the FUK out!

Funny thing my friend showed me today:  http://www.k-class.com/index2.htm

Download some tracks by Angelous you will giggle your friggin' ass off.  It's da rock in da buildin'!  Hova!

I was reading Chicmonk's most recent posting, and I think it's hilarious how powerful the yellow rubber glove makes people feel.  You know what I'm talkin about don't you?  Dirty toilet bowls?  Sticky garbage cans?  I will never ever clean that stuff with my bare hands but with that yellow rubber glove of justice, I could pick up a piece of shit and walk down a catwalk.

But I guess expats from China wouldn't know, since we all have ayi's here that clean up after us.  Most of the expats I know have their own maids etc.  Makes life real easy, but I think people will develop bad habits.

To those commenting about SARS in SH, I still think that it doesn't make sense there are only 6 confirmed cases in SH when the following seem to be established facts:

- Shanghai is such an international city with travellers coming in and out constantly
- there are over 1,000 SARS cases in Hong Kong
- cases have been increasing in BJ by 100 a day since April 20
- Toronto, half way around the world away, has over 100 cases
- they just quarantined 10,000 people in Nanjing, a city right beside Shanghai

There's defiinitely a shyteload out here.  Stats 101 people.

Happy Birthdays to Mosely, Lawrence Keith and Rick!